Bruises and Paper Cuts

I put on my make up this morning as if to promise myself I wouldn't cry

I should've left the mascara on the counter

Red nails and impulsive memories are cards laid out on the table
And you still have a smile on your face

Playing a game of hide and seek until I realized you'd never find me
I doubt you were even trying
I wish I could believe that you were trying

French tips and dyed hair
Your heart has been tied up and toyed with, erasing beats of passion or care for anything but her

Boy I know you remember my name
But I doubt you remember my mind

My words are dancing circles around your naive promises and I don't want to dance anymore

There's no need to try and keep your word; your sentences have only ever formed with faulty locks and too many keys
I'm done pretending

Your name is surrounded in "what if"s and "maybe"s and my heart it's tired of hopeless day dreams

I haven't seen you
I haven't forgotten you
But I'm losing you

No matter how hard I try to change time's hand
No matter the distance I close between you and I
No matter how many times you promise me you want me too..

I can't hold onto nothing
And I promise
You'll be just fine without me

There are bruises in my chest and paper cuts in my stomach

I should've known that racing hearts and butterflies would lie about reality

~JQP